"Don't worship me. I'd make a lousy god. There'd be no day off, for starters."
— Dr. Who (Christopher Eccleston)
"May my last breath be drawn through a pipe, and exhaled in a jest."
— Charles Lamb (1775 - 1834)
"You may be immortal but I can still do damage. How'd you like to spend eternity in 5 pieces?"
— Xena, Warrior Princess
Joe Dirt
A - So your gonna tell me that you don't have no black cats, no roman candles, or screaming mimis?
B - No.
A - Oh come on man. You got no lady fingers, fuzz buttles, snicker bombs, church burners, finger blasters, gut busters, zippity do das, or crap flappers?
B - No, I don't.
A - You're gonna stand there, owning a fireworks stand, and tell me you don't have no whistling bungholes, no spleen splitters, whisker biscuits, honkey lighters, husker dus, husker don'ts, cherry bombs, nipsy daisers, with or without the scooter stick, or one single whistling kitty chaser?
B - No…because snakes and sparklers are the only ones I like.
A - Well that might be your problem. It's not what you like, it's the consumer.
